Monday, March 6, 2017

 People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime...

The title of this article really resonates with me lately. There are people in our life – whether blood related or not – that we are close to, that we share our deepest fears and highest happiness with.  It might be a mom, sister, friend, brother or even a co-worker that you feel comfortable with.  Each of these people that we have in our lives, represent a need to be fulfilled.  We have that “fun” friend we call when all we want to do is go out and be silly.  We have that person that we call when we need to cry or vent to.  We have the person who represents true happiness, if we are lucky enough to have someone, that is.  Well, what happens when that person you have to fill that part of your life starts drifting away???  What do we do?  It happens...and sometimes it hurts.

I have a friend, Sara, who is someone that was extremely close to me.  She could walk into my house at any given day, any given time, without even knocking- no matter what, even when I was in a relationship.  She was single, I was single, we had each other to lean on no matter what. I took her to the hospital for procedures she had done.  I even studied while in the waiting room for her.  She hadn’t needed to even ask me when she told me she needed to have this done. She was my friend, and I would always be there to support her- in sickness and health, happiness and sadness.


When I started dating a man, who I eventually married – things changed drastically.  Her phone calls ebbed, her visits stopped all together, and I wondered why.  When I talked to my mother, she had said maybe its because you are married now.  That couldn’t be true because, somehow, she was spending more time with my sister than me.  They went to concerts, (not even thinking to invite me), they met up for lunch or drinks out and about for a night of karaoke, again without me.  How could that be?  Sara and I were best friends, always were. I will admit that I felt hurt that when the 2 of them went out to do things together and I wasn’t even thought once about to be invited. I thought she was here for a lieftime.  Some of you may be saying, well it’s because your sister is single too. Well, she isn’t, so that isn’t a reason.  She is married with 2 girls.  I love my sister very much and I love my best friend very much, but how could they just throw me to the side like I am no one??  I brought this up to the 2 of them, asking what happened??  They said “well, you are married now”…what does that matter?  My husband has his hobbies and his friends, and I have mine.  We have a healthy marriage.  We do things together.  We do things apart, we are happy.


Some of you reading this might think, "why does she sound so petty?"  To me, it isn't oetty.  Sara is as close to me as a sister.  It feels like things just changed overnight, and I wasn't privvy to what happened even though I am 1/2 of this friendship.

 

These last 2 years, I feel like she has completely slipped away.  I see her posts on Facebook.  I never even get a response from my texts or phone calls anymore. It's like I am being ghosted.  I begin to think, has she served her purpose in my life???  Is this how the universe is telling me, she is moving on, and so should I?  It seems weird and maybe even desperate.  But this woman, who has become such an important part of my life for the better part of 10 years, can’t just disappear, at least in my beliefs. I feel that I deserve an explanation, a 10 year friendship surely deserves that much respect. But after reading an article saying that people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime, I begin to wonder- Is that true?  Share your thoughts please…